Jaid Barrymore and Drew Barrymore.Photo:Ron Galella/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
Ron Galella/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
Drew Barrymoreand her mother,Jaid Barrymore, have had a complicated relationship over the years.
Severing ties with her mother at such a young age was “the worst pain I’ve ever known,” Drew later revealed onThe Howard Stern Showin 2021. Their relationship remained difficult well into Drew’s adult life — even as she became a mother herself. (The actress shares daughters Olive and Frankie with ex-husbandWill Kopelman.)
“It’s the hardest subject in my life,” Drew toldMarie Claireabout her mother in 2014 when the two were still estranged. “I’ve never just been angry with her. I’ve always felt guilt and empathy and utter sensitivity. But we can’t really be in each other’s lives at this point.”
Drew and Jaid eventually found peace, however. “I feel goodness toward my mom. I feel empathy and understanding,” she toldHoward Sternin March 2021.
From their ups and downs over the years to their current mother-daughter bond, here’s everything to know about Drew Barrymore’s relationship with her mother, Jaid Barrymore.
Yvonne Hemsey/Getty
Drew was born on Feb. 22, 1975, to John Drew and Jaid — and while her parents didn’t officially divorce until 1984, Drew’s father wasn’t in the picture from the time she was very young. Despite his absence, Drew reported “somehow” having“zero baggage or dad issues”in an Instagram post about her late father in June 2020.
“My mom chose a wild card for my dad,” Drew wrote on social media about her father, who died in 2004. “I think I would have liked to have a dad who didn’t look so out there. Or who stayed. Or was capable of anything really. But his wildness runs through me.”
Drew’s relationship with her mother, though, was complicated from a young age. As a single mother, Jaid worked as a waitress six nights a week to support herself and Drew — but Drew viewed her mother’s efforts as abandonment.
It was “another parent who didn’t care about me,” Drew told PEOPLE in 1989.
But in her 2015 memoirWildflower, Drew had a more sympathetic view of her mother.
“I was born in 1975 to a single mother who was doing her best while still being young herself,” Drew wrote. “It is not who I am to harbor any anger for the fact that our life together was so incredibly unorthodox.”
Jaid was involved in Drew’s acting career from a young age
Drew Barrymore and mother Jaid Barrymore attend 55th Annual Academy Awards on April 11, 1983.Ron Galella, Ltd./Ron Galella Collection/Getty
Ron Galella, Ltd./Ron Galella Collection/Getty
When Drew began acting as a child (famously appearing in 1982’sE.T.as a 7-year-old), her mother, Jaid, abandoned her own career to focus solely on her daughter’s. Jaid took over as manager for Drew, involving herself in every aspect of Drew’s booming acting career — from reading scripts to attending auditions.
But, growing up, Drew did not appreciate her mother’s involvement in her line of work. In fact, it came to be a major point of contention in their relationship when she was younger, she revealed to PEOPLE in 1989.
“I came to resent her because it seemed so much [of her] life and career was invested in me,” Drew shared at the time.
But as Drew grew older and matured, she came to view her mother’s dedication to her acting career in a different light. “What I never realized was my mom changed her life so I could continue doing something I loved,” she said.
Jaid would party with Drew when she was a young girl
Drew Barrymore and Jaid Barrymore.Jim Smeal/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
Jim Smeal/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
One example of Jaid and Drew’s unconventional mother-daughter relationship was the fact that Drew would frequently party with her mother and her mother’s friends — despite being just a young girl herself, Drewrevealed toThe Guardianin 2015.
By 8 years old, Drew was going out with Jaid up to five nights a week, she shared. Then, when she was just 9, Drew was seen accompanying her mother to the famous New York nightclub Studio 54 — where she was reportedly exposed to drugs and encouraged to dance with other young male actors, according toThe Guardian.
In 2018, Drew opened up about her childhood partying days to the late Norm Macdonald on his Netflix showNorm Macdonald Has a Show.
“I had a mom, but she was more like my best friend,” Drew told Macdonald. “She was like, ‘Do you want to go to school and get bullied all day, or do you want to go to Studio 54?’ And I was like, ‘Yes, absolutely!’ ”
Drew became legally emancipated from her parents at 14
Jaid Barrymore and Drew Barrymore during the “Pacific Heights” Los Angeles Premiere.Jim Smeal/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
When Drew became a teenager, her turbulent relationship with her mother came to a head when Jaid had herplaced in a psychiatric ward at13 years old. “I was going to clubs and not going to school and stealing my mom’s car and, you know, I was out of control,” Drew reflected during a 2021 appearance onThe Howard Stern Show.
“That’s a big consideration when people are casting you,” she said at the time.
Decades later, Drew wrote more about her emancipation from her parents inher 2015 memoirWildflower. According to Drew, it was a way to restart her acting career following her time spent in a psychiatric ward.
“Work was a very positive thing in my life, and sadly it had been taken away because my mother also put me in an institution because she felt helpless,” Drew wrote. “But when people found out, they just wrote me off as damaged goods, and I sadly understood that.”
She added, “I was never unprofessional, but I was on a hiatus from being employable.”
Drew went on to describe her emancipation as starting her life over, on her “own terms” — a move that her mother, Jaid, fully supported, she added.
Jaid and Drew had a strained relationship for decades
Drew Barrymore and Jaid Barrymore attend the Young Musicians Foundation’s Second Annual Celebrity Mother/Daughter Fashion Show on March 10, 1983.Betty Galella/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
Betty Galella/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
“We parted ways when I was fourteen, and we have rarely spoken since,” Drew wrote inWildflower.
Despite spending many years not on speaking terms, Drew revealed in her memoir that she still supported her mother financially and ensured that she was “taken care of.”
“I am grateful to this woman for bringing me into this world, and it would crush me to know she was in need anywhere,” Drew wrote. “It is not who I am to harbor any anger for the fact that our life together was so incredibly unorthodox.”
Drew elaborated on her complicated relationship with her mother in a 2023Vultureprofile, revealing that — despite their history — shewould always care for Jaidand wished her no ill-will.
“I actually want her to be happy and thrive and be healthy,” Drew toldVulture.
She continued, “I do care. I’ll never not care. I don’t know if I’ve ever known how to fully guard, close off, not feel, build the wall up.”
Drew paid tribute to Jaid when she publishedWildflowerin 2015
Drew Barrymore & mother Jaid Barrymore.Kevin Mazur/WireImage
Kevin Mazur/WireImage
Though Drew and Jaid’s relationship remained complicated at the time, the actressposted a tribute to her motheron Instagram prior to the 2015 publication of her memoirWildflower.
“Today I wrote a book,” Drew captioned the throwback photo. “And as I thank and celebrate many women this week, I must say a huge thank you to my mother. As I say in the acknowledgements, ‘thank you for my life. I am ever so pleased to be here!’ ”
She added, “We have had quite a road, but it is paved with gratitude. #amazingwomenweek #wildflowerbook.”
Drew also made mention of her mother in the acknowledgements of her memoir. “To my mother, Ildiko Jaid Barrymore,” she wrote. “Thank you. I am ever so pleased to be on this planet!”
Jaid and Drew have since mended their relationship
Drew Barrymore and Jaid Barrymore at the Club Tonic in New York City, NY.Carmen Valdes/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
Carmen Valdes/Ron Galella Collection/Getty
After years of strife in their relationship, Drew revealed in a March 2021 episode ofThe Drew Barrymore Showthat she and her mother Jaid were in a “good” place.
“There’s just some peace and respect and maturity there that could not have taken place maybe before. Timing is everything,” Drew said on her talk show about her relationship with her mother.
Drew opened up more to PEOPLE in December 2022 aboutforming a healthy relationship with Jaidafter years of discord. The actress revealed how being a mother herself (to daughters Olive and Frankie) helped give her perspective with her own mother — and how she would always be there for her.
“I will always support her,” Drew told PEOPLE about Jaid. “I can’t turn my back on the person who gave me my life. I can’t do it. It would hurt me so much. I would find it so cruel. But there are times where I’ve realized that our chemistry and behavior will drum up a feeling in me where I have to say, ‘Okay, I need a break again.’ ”
source: people.com
